Indians Continue Desecrating New Yankee Stadium

The New York Yankees probably wanted a storybook opening for their new stadium on Thursday: A dominating start from C. C. Sabathia, production from their new bats, and a lively crowd cheering them on to victory. For six innings, that was happening. Then the bullpen melted down, the Indians dropped nine runs on the Yankees’ heads in one inning, and the rest was merely academic. New York got their revenge on Friday, rallying for a 6-5 on a Derek Jeter (naturally) home run, which raised the Yankee fans’ spirits and sent them jubilant into the weekend.


(The Indians should forfeit those 14 runs, just to be pricks about it.)

Today, however, was a slightly different story. Chien-Ming Wang made a convincing case for AAA demotion, and the Indians topped their Thursday desecration of the new joint by pouring in 14 runs in one inning, all part of a 22-4 demolition. ESPN.COM detailed the historic nature of the ass-pounding delivered by the Tribe:

It was the most runs by a major league team in an inning since the Boston Red Sox scored 14 in the first against the Florida Marlins on June 27, 2003, at Fenway Park, according to STATS LLC. Cleveland tied its franchise record set in the first inning on June 18, 1950, against the Philadelphia Athletics.

The 14 runs and 13 hits amassed by the Indians were the most allowed by the Yankees in an inning.

Those 22 runs almost match Houston’s output for the entire season; in 10 games, the Astros have scored just 27 runs. That’s good enough for a 3-7 record. The funny part is that having scored 80 runs (FUN FACT: That’s almost three times as many!), the Indians aren’t really much better than Houston; they’re 4-8, something that may have to do with the fact that the woeful Cleveland pitching staff has allowed 80 runs as well, and without the luxury of being able to hide 22 of them in one single game.

The crowd that gave the world the “Bronx Cheer” didn’t disappoint; having fully accepted the fact that their pinstripers were not, in fact, coming back from the massive deficit, they decided to shower the Yankees with a “We want Swisher” chant, asking for a reprise of Nick Swisher’s surreal relief appearance in Tampa on Monday. This, mind you, is not the first time they did so; they did so on Thursday as well.

We don’t really recommend bringing in Swisher, of course. Not because it wouldn’t be funny - it would - but because novelty wears off long before elbow tendons heal:

Jose Canseco pitches
(Lest we forget.)