Skateboarder Forgets ‘Half Your Age Plus 7′ Rule

With the rise of the so-called genre of action sports, a lot of snowboards are rising to mainstream recognition after having some success in competitions like the X-Games, and so forth.

Brian Patch Skateboarding

(Whoa, dude. She looks 18 from up here)

And if that doesn’t work, you could always score some ink in the police blotter by allegedly nailing a 15-year-old girl.

Brian Patch, 36, is listed as a “star skateboarder” in an ATLANTA JOURNAL CONSTITUTION report that cites him has having happy time with a girl that was half his age, minus three:

Prosecutors say Patch had sex with the girl, who slept at his house after she ran away from home in April. The girl, identified only as Jane Doe, was also a skateboarder and had known Patch for three years.

The five-time X-Games medalist is scheduled to be arraigned today on one felony count of Mark Chmura, er, of lewd acts with a child. And since Patch isn’t a female middle school teacher, we can expect a very exuberant prosecution. And unlike the throng of girly skate fans, the state will do all they can to make sure Patch doesn’t get off. There aren’t many details here; some of the skaters are trying to guess the girl’s identity, and not getting anywhere. The news is rocking the skateboarding community, as Patch was popular with fans.

Skateboarders might be that perfect blend of athlete and rock star; surely the groupie pool had a few selectable candidates that were of age. Sheesh. Kids today. They grow up so slowly. The hot ones, anyway.