Hocking Your Players’ Possessions Is Educational

Step 1: Become youth volleyball coach. Step 2: Ask player to remove jewelry before match. Step 3: Profit. A St. Petersburg, Florida, recreation center volleyball coach who took a necklace from one of her players for “safekeeping” evidently decided that the most secure place to store it would be the local pawn shop. And in her defense, those places do have bars on the windows.

Jennifer Guarino

Meet Jennifer Guarino, 20, a coach who allegedly used the easy method above to score a sweet payday. Meet me at Chili’s … El Nino margaritas for everyone! The only trouble was, though, she got caught.

From the MIAMI HERALD:

It was during an April 20 game at Northwest Recreation Center, 5801 22nd Ave. N, that the teen told police her coach had her take off her jewelry and place it in a bag while she played.

But when the teen went to get the bag from her coach the next day, police say a 14-karat gold necklace worth $300 was missing. The necklace was reported stolen, and police say it didn’t turn up until Guarino recently pawned it for $135.

The police call it a crime, I call it a lesson in both ethics and economics. First, Guarino got a 45 percent return on the original cost of the item, and a 100 percent return on her own investment; excellent results on both counts. And she also taught her players about the importance of not trusting anyone, even your own coach. That’s a valuable lesson these days.

Also, and no one is giving her any credit for this, Guarino failed to have sex with anyone. And if you’ve been following the exploits of many high school coaches and teachers lately, that’s a breath of fresh air.

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