HIPSTER RED ALERT: Chicago 2016 Shirts On Sale

If you’ve got a healthy sense of irony and a sh*theel streak a mile long, we’ve got sensational news for you. As you’ve likely heard, Chicago was axed from Olympic consideration this afternoon as the IOC tabbed Rio for the 2016 games. Thongs and drugs ahoy! What does that mean for you, hipster? Only a sensational addition to your collection of ironic shirts. Behold.

Chicago Olympic 2016 Shirts
(Hahahahahahaha)

Yes, as of right now, they’re still on sale; for the low low price of $18.99, you too can have a relic of defeat that’ll make all your thick-rimmed glasses-wearing friends envious. Our favorite part? Oh, without a doubt, the “BE A PART OF IT!” on the back. What’s the “IT”? Epic failure? We could see that.

If you’re not seeing the appeal in these shirts, Patton Oswalt is more than happy to explain. Video is after the jump.

Seriously. Buy this shirt, stow it in your basement, and in two years, dust it off and knock your fellow ironic friends dead. This is like finding an old “Welcome back from the Titanic” banner in an antique store. Don’t miss this opportunity.