Phoenix Suns guard Grant Hill, he of Duke and “the next Jordan” fame, made one of his occasional appearances on the DAN PATRICK SHOW, but the cameo brought out some surprisingly good dirt. He had some strong stuff on Shaquille O’Neal, but nothing topped what Hill confirmed about former Duke teammate Christian Laettner: He’s just a big, pompous jerk.

According to Hill, Laettner spent his college years bullying his teammates, including former all-everything point guard Bobby Hurley, and would be a perfect candidate for his own reality show. Possibly even a show where he travels through Kentucky making fun of the natives. Hill thinks he’d be a natural for it. Why?

“Laettner is a little bit of a jerk,” Hill said. “And I mean that in a nice way.”

Sure, Grant. Sure you do. Of course, he had some good ideas for even more nicknames for Shaq, too.

So, why didn’t Hill give Shaq a hard time about being on the trading block?

 “I call him the 50 Cent of the NBA,” Hill said. “If you say anything bad about him, he’ll have a mixed tape about you the next day.”

That seems like a reasonable reason to avoid O’Neal. Of course, neither Hill or O’Neal may be in a Suns jersey come next season. According to Hill, no one on the Suns roster is untouchable in the offseason, not even Steve Nash. Why? Well, there could be plenty of reasons behind it, but we’re betting it has something to do with team owner Robert Sarver being next to broke. After all, if he was willing to jettison Amar’e Stoudamire — the team’s most marketable asset — for a bag of chips at the trade deadline, why would anyone else be safe?

Then again, there’s always a silver lining. If Hill does get shipped along, maybe he can retire and join Laettner on a traveling circus through Kentucky. After all, Laettner always did need a straight man.