• Why would Allen Iverson ever join the Grizzlies? Because God told him to.

• Andrea McNulty is willing to drop her sexual assault lawsuit against Ben Roethlisberger - as long as Big Ben admits he did it.

• A foolish foursome tries to steal Cal Ripken Jr.’s “8″ statue from the front of Camden Yards.

• The Redskins are redfaced over the bad publicity of suing a 72-year-old woman over season tickets, so they opt not to take grandma’s 66 grand.

• Since when did Cole Hamels go the David Beckham metrosexual route?

• A Twitter post suggests that LeGarrette Blount’s blindside blast to Byron Hout’s jaw may have been motivated by the Boise DE dropping an n-bomb.

• A Chicago Bears fan using his gym sign to refer to Packers fans with a homophobic slur? That’s so gay.

• Ex-Eagles receiver Freddie Mitchell can’t stop raving about a new coffee that promises to put the zowsers back in your trousers.

• An 18-year-long kidnapping & sexual assault ordeal would make a perfect set-up for a light-hearted look at all the sports news the victim missed.

• Another year, another Bengals QB named Palmer bashing the Buckeyes.