BASEBALL BUNCH BUFFOON BAD BENGALS BEFORE BILLY D: The team that’s giving you “Billy Donovan Night” recently offered up another amusing promotion with “Don’t be a Bengal, Be A Good Citizen Night“:

The Fort Myers Miracle gave a salute to the NFL’s own Cell Block C on Thursday will all sorts of jail-themed jocularity. Fans wearing orange were given literal slaps on the wrists by an on-site lawyer, while team employees with handcuffs wore Chad Johnson jerseys with targets on the back. Chad Johnson even threw out the opening pitch (not Ocho Cinco himself, but a similar named fellow).

Upcoming Miracle events to keep an eye on include “Mike Tyson Ear Night” on June 28 annd “Scientology Night” on August 10.

It’s no surprise that the Fort Myers squad is co-owned by Mike Veeck, the man behind such minor league memories as “Nobody Night” (where fans were kept out of the park in order to set the lowest-ever baseball attendance record), and a proposed “Vasectomy Night” on Father’s Day.