Former Porn Star Plays Musical Defense For Coach

The hapless coach of the French national soccer team, in danger of being run out of the country for his team’s poor play, is now suddenly popular, all because a former porno actress has written a hit song about him. So typical.

Raymond Domenech, Catherine Ringer

Sample lyric of the song Je Kiffe Raymond (I Fancy Raymond): “If he attacked my penalty areas, I would be without defenders,” sings Catherine Ringer, who became famous in France as a member of Les Rita Mitsouko, an art-rock group. And of course lots and lots of ’70s porn. Which I felt compelled to research, because that’s the kind of investigative reporter I am.

My favorite of her films so far: “P**** Teaser.” With 1977’s haunting “Love Inferno” coming in a close second.

Raymond Domenech, manager of the French national team, has been under heavy criticism from both fans and media as his squad tries to qualify for the World Cup. But his popularity is rising due to Ringer, who has a crush on on him and just had to express herself in song — which is a hit throughout Europe. And why not? Just look at that photo above, and a card from his playing days below. He could have been a porn start himself with that stache.

Here’s the song, in case you’re in the mood for something entirely in French:

“We’ve had incredible media exposure for this,” said a spokesman for Because Music, her production company. “It’s worthy of the launch of the most hyped singles.”

She wrote and recorded the song in a few hours after listening on the radio as Domenech’s tactical choices and man management were lambasted by experts. None of her advisers took la chanson seriously at first and it was put on her website as a free download — a trailer for her forthcoming album.

Raymond Domenech

(Form an orderly line, ladies)

For even more research on Ms. Ringer, here’s the site GLAMOROUS PILES:

I did some searching on her and found out she did some pretty amazing porn in the ‘70s along with some avant-garde theatre work. Her porn is pretty stunning in itself — a lot of shots of ****ing a broom, *****ing in a guy’s mouth … but through it all she exhibits a strange sense of humor.