On Saturday, Sheffield United goalkeeper Paddy Kenny will have to cope with Wayne Rooney, Cristina Ronaldo, and Ryan Giggs bearing down on him for the better part of 90 minutes.
But the challenge presented by Manchester United won’t be nearly as daunting as what he faced earlier this week.
While bar-hopping earlier this week, one of Kenny’s friends claimed to have slept with his wife. The keeper responded by breaking a bottle over the man’s head, who, in turn, bit off Kenny’s left eyebrow.
The only thing more shocking than Kenny’s inability to defend himself against such a bizarre attack is the fact that Tottenham Hotspur’s Jermain Defoe was not involved.