Tuition at Duke will run about $36,000 next year. Throw in room and board, food, stripper expenses, etc., and you’re looking at $50,000 a year. For that cost, you expect a full-service organization that is able to call on all kinds of external forces to get you exactly what you need to succeed at all times.
(Now that’s service: Thor, the god of thunder, is a Dukie.)
Case in point: when Clemson went ahead of Duke’s baseball team Sunday on a two-run homer in the top of the 11th, a Duke team official rushed onto the field with a text message claiming lightning nearby. The game was delayed and then suspended when rain eventually fell. Because Duke never batted, the home run came off the board. The game ended in a tie.
Oddly, the text message came from Wichita, Kansas. No lightning was ever actually spotted. Also, Duke officials refused to pull the tarp onto the field due to a technicality, letting the field become a soggy mess. In another coincidence, this keeps Clemson only a half-game ahead of Duke for the final ACC Championship tourney spot.
Thankfully, Duke kept the young men of both teams safe from harm, including that caused by the shame of falling another half-game more behind in the race for the final slot. You get what you pay for, right?