Fan Banned From Ballpark for Messin’ wit’ Mr. Met

Another Mets season is down the drain. Another late-season collapse, another October spent watching the playoffs instead of participating in them. Nothing left to do than to process all the Mets fans arrested throughout the year.

Mr. Met ladies

(Just call him L.L.M.M. - Ladies Love Mr. Met)

First on the docket is Christian Hansen, a 32-year-old from Brooklyn who performed a mid-season meltdown that would make the Mets’ September swoon proud. But this just wasn’t a case of your average everday drunk & disorderly conduct. Hansen did the unthinkable and went after the only Met still respected by the fans - Mr. Met himself.

The NEW YORK DAILY NEWS reports that Hansen “admitted to badgering the baseball-headed mascot - while swatting young fans out of his way - during a May 31 home game against the Los Angeles Dodgers, which the Mets won, 3-2.”

Harassing the team mascot and bullying young kids? But wait, there’s more:

During the melee, Hansen repeatedly refused orders to leave Shea Stadium, took a swing at a security guard and spit in his face, authorities said.

Not a very Christian way to act at all.

So, what did Mr. Hansen get for messin’ with Mr. Met? A $500 fine and indefinite banishment from future Mets home games at the brand-spanking-new Citi Field. Hansen’s just lucky Mr. Met didn’t have his legs broken.

But there were other legal matters for the Mets to attend to. Seventeen people were arrested during the final weekend series at Shea, many for trying to steal seats & plaques from the soon-to-be demolished ballpark.

For example, John Daly (no, not that one - we think) was charged with “ripping a Mets banner - bolts and all - off a stadium wall.” Considering another disappointing season, we’re not sure if he wanted the banner as a keepsake, or wanted to toss it into the East River.

Which buffoonish baseball character most deserves a beating?

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