BECKHAM DESPERATE TO BEND(OVER) FOR “HOUSEWIVES”? Various entertainment blogs are reporting that “Desperate Housewives” creator Marc Cherry is planning to introduce a gay male couple into the plotline of the show for next season.

And in an apparent effort to make the cast as authentic as possible, Cherry is hoping to sign David Beckham and Robbie Williams for the role.

If you live inside the 48 contiguous states, you don’t know who Williams is, but we hear he’s a titan of British Show Business. Which holds about as much weight as being a foremost expert on British cuisine.