One thing we’ve never really understood about coaches and politicians is their allergy to the Internet. We don’t expect them to go to those idiot farms like the message boards on, like, SCOUT.COM where everyone’s post ends with a picture of Jessica Alba’s ass and one of Calvin pissing on the helmet of their most hated team and they say things like “FIRE (any head coach, ever) NOW” or anything, of course. But come on; you know they have email addresses and Blackberries (EXCEPTION: Joe Paterno, whose “text messages” are still sent via telegraph, or carrier pigeon if he’s feeling whimsical). But yet, without fail, whenever someone asks them about the Internet, they refer to it like they have no idea what’s going on and they’re just ramming random terms together: “What’s internet,” “I don’t youtube the googles,” etc. etc.
In that respect (and probably only that respect), Dennis Erickson is normal. The lovable scamp, presumably taking taking a break from wondering how to leave Arizona State in Probation Hell (they are the “Sun Devils,” after all), told the PORTLAND TRIBUNE who really counts when it comes to opinions (thanks, EDSBS):
“I don’t pay any attention to those chat boards,” says Erickson, proving his point with the fractured nomenclature of the computer-challenged. “They’re so ridiculous. Some of my assistants look at them, and the stuff people write … I tell them, ‘Why would you guys ever read those things? Those people don’t count.’
“Don’t count”? ” “Don’t count”?! Why don’t you go burn some more books, Mao! Hitler thought the Jews didn’t count, and look how that turned out! DENNIS ERICKSON IS A SUPERNAZI!
Interestingly, Erickson doesn’t discount newspapers in the same breath. Perhaps it’s because he prefers the company of safe, non-threatening career writers who provide pablum like the headline of this Tribune article, “Trying to do a Sun Devil of a job” (seriously).
And how does Erickson regard things like online recruiting rankings? Why, you’ll never guess:
RIVALS.COM rates Arizona State’s 2009 recruiting class fourth in the Pac-10 and 30th nationally. Scout.com had the Sun Devils’ class sixth and 36th. Erickson couldn’t care less.
“I don’t believe in all that rating crap,” he sniffs. “You know who you want in your theory of doing things. The players are out there, and you get your type of players, and then you coach the hell out of them.
And then you probation the hell out of the program.