KU COACH, QB READY TO PUT MARK ON MORE THAN SBARRO Much like Kansas football coach Mark Mangino’s postgame Saturday ritual at Sbarro, Jayhawks football is slowly approaching world domination, with a 8-0 record going into their game against Nebraska this Saturday.

Honestly, we wouldn’t be surprised if the ‘Hawks lost the rest of their regular […]

STOCK TIP: TIME TO INVEST IN CONDOM COMPANIES NOW! The ASSOCIATED PRESS reports that after much prolonged, agonizing consternation, FIFA decided this week to award the 2014 World Cup to Brazil.

It was a really tough decision for Sepp Blatter & Co., considering “Brazil was the only candidate and won in a unanimous vote Tuesday by […]

TACOBY BELLSBURY URGES AMERICA TO STAGGER FLUSHES: Today is the day that wastewater treatment facilities go to Defcon 1 as Taco Bell gives out free tacos for its World Series promotion. The marketing idea was sheer genius, as the dirt burrito factory announced before the Series that it would give away one free taco to […]

• COVERS.COM takes a raincheck, as Floyd Mayweather Jr. jabs out of an appearance at an Obama fundraiser:

• BIG TEN TAILGATE pulls over the news of a Penn State fan doing some touch-ups on a Ohio car - with a 2×4.• Before giving out his Top Ten about the World Series losers, David Letterman proclaimed, […]

MINNY BOSS BLAMING EX-COACH FOR T-WOLVES WOES: What do you do when your NBA franchise is in shambles, and you just gave up your star player? Blame the coach you fired three years ago, of course!

The DETROIT NEWS passes the buck to Glen Taylor, owner of the Minnesota Timberwolves, who claims a lot of his […]

ROBIN LEACHES ON TO SAC KINGS OWNER’S HOUSE PARTY: Just when you thought you were safe from champagne wishes and caviar dreams, Robin Leach is back with a vengance. And he’s schmoozing aloofly with the Maloofs:

Robin recently landed at the housewarming party of Gavin Maloof, co-owner of the Sacramento Kings and the Palms Casino. The […]

TORRE BUSTING OUT OF THE BRONX ZOO FOR LA-LA-LAND? Does Joe Torre love L.A., or is it all just California dreamin’?

The WESTCHESTER (NY) JOURNAL NEWS reports that the ex-Yankees skipper is expected to become the Dodgers’ new manager. And the NEW YORK TIMES is also spreading the news that Torre is Tinseltown-bound.Recently, the Dodgers were […]