WE’RE HOLDING OUT HOPE FOR A HAKAN LOOB ASHTRAY: The Great One is ready to offer you great deals, as Wayne Gretzky will be holding a garage sale:

KNBC in Los Angeles reports that Gretzky and wife Janet are selling off their stuff in order to help raise money for schools in the SoCal town of […]

• BIG TEN TAILGATE learns what the ladies of LSU think of their ex-football coach:

• FAN IQ keeps their eye on the road, as Dale Earnhardt Jr. questions his crew about the Redskins in mid-race.
• The SAN ANTONIO EXPRESS-NEWS unpacks the bags of new Spur Ime Udoka, who’s spent time in Fargo, Argentina, and as […]

EXCLUSIVE PIC OF A THICK VICK NICKED IN THE STICKS: Michael Vick just can’t stay away from trouble with the law. SbBer Marc snaps this exclusive shot of the canine-KO’ing QB getting cuffed by the cops:

We’re sure the Falcons faithful are flustered at how fat their favorite federal-case fool has filled out.

It appears prison food […]

SUSPECTS ARRESTED IN SHOOTING OF MEMPHIS FB PLAYER: Three men have been arrested in connection with the shooting death of a University of Memphis football player:

EYEWITNESS NEWS MEMPHIS reports that Victor Trezevant, Courtney Washington, and Daeshawn Tate were brought in Sunday as suspects in the murder of Taylor Bradford. None of the three are […]

NHL NETWORK SKATING ITS WAY TO AMERICAN TV HOMES: Following in the footsteps of the NFL, NBA and Big Ten, the NHL is getting ready to unleash a network of their own to the American viewing public:

TV WEEK reports that the NHL Network has just finalized agreements to be carried by many major cable and […]

BRONCO PLAYER ACCUSES FANS OF LEAVING CRIME SCENE: Second-year Denver Broncos receiver Brandon Marshall showed everyone just how discriminating a fan he is Sunday night after the Broncos were savaged by SD 41-3.

Marshall told the media after the game that he was appalled that ticket-buying Broncos fans (average ticket price: $75) who left early (nearly […]

• HUGGING HAROLD REYNOLDS warns teams in the MLB postseason to keep Jimmy Fallon away (as if they need a reason, anyway):

• DEADSPIN bounces us the name of the next big NBA hopeful, whose jerseys would certainly outsell LeBron’s, Kobe’s and Jordan’s combined - Gregor Fucka.
• AWFUL ANNOUNCING makes room for Tim McCarver on the […]

TABLE FOR ONE IN SAN ANTONIO FOR KU’S MARK MANGINO?: As foreshadowed on Friday, our weekend plate was mostly filled by Mark Mangino’s Manhattan magic act, as our favorite team shocked the world community (Yemen was off the hook!) with a stunning victory over Kansas State.

With neither Oklahoma nor Texas looming on KU’s menu, we’re […]

WHAT WILL BE THE ONLY FUNNY MOMENT FOR YOUR $14: Another hastily-slapped-together sports movie by Will Ferrell is in the offing, this time something called “Semi-Pro“:

The release is a fictional account of an ABA team in the mid-’70s, and no doubt the trailer(s) will contain the only funny moments in the film:

Or maybe not.

THIS JUST HAS TO BE NORV TURNER’S FAULT, SOMEHOW: The CHICAGO TRIBUNE crunches some numbers that will probably surprise you: MLB is about to catch the NFL in total revenue.

The C-T noted recently that MLB revenue projections for the 2007 season are $5.8B. The NFL enjoyed $5.7B in revenue in 2005 and expects that “to […]