NHL Team Offers Free Food To All Fans In Attendance For Second Straight Season

BLUES KNOW HOW TO GUARANTEE ONE SELLOUT PER YEAR: The CANADIAN PRESS reports that for the second straight season, the St. Louis Blues will offer free food to all fans in attendance at the team’s Jan. 19 game against Nashville.

CP: “Fans will be able to have hot dogs, chicken fingers, chips, popcorn, peanuts, soft drinks […]


Michael Vick Pleads Guilty To Dogfighting Charges

WELL, AT LEAST WE STILL HAVE TIM DONAGHY (FOR NOW): The ASSOCIATED PRESS reports, “Michael Vick’s lawyer said Monday the NFL star will plead guilty to federal dogfighting conspiracy charges.

“The offense is punishable by up to five years in prison and a $250,000 fine, although federal sentencing guidelines most likely would call for less. […]


Maradona Hates America Will All His Strength Crumbles At Sight Of Choco Taco

MARADONA HATES AMERICA; CHOCO TACOS, NOT SO MUCH: We searched far and wide for satisfactory sports television to no avail yesterday.
If only we spoke Spanish!

Turns out our favorite recent gastric bypass surgery recipient and illegal intoxicant user (think John Daly about 35 minutes after he retires), Maradona, appeared on Hugo Chavez’s weekly TV show […]


Amanda Beard Nude Photo Autographs Now Available

GOLDEN AGE OF WOMEN’S SPORTS IS OFFICIALLY UPON US: Here’s a quick, recent sampling of just how far women’s sports have come in recent times:

The SAN DIEGO UNION-TRIBUNE reports last weekend that as keynote speaker for a youth tennis benefit in San Diego at the city’s Grand Hyatt hotel, tennis legend and women’s rights activist […]


Chris Berman Dunkin Donuts Promotion Has Us Aching For Bacon

AND WE QUOTE: “HI, I’M CHRIS ‘BACON LOVER’ BERMAN“: You have to hand to it to Dunkin’ Donuts for furiously trying to spin it’s image. Normally when we think of donuts and butter-battered biscuits with bacon shoehorned into them, brain synapse-stopping images of lardasses with regrettable public hygiene issues are soon to follow.

But in […]


Jayson Stark Ignores Joe Dimaggio And Kirby Puckett In Baseball Book

IT TAKES BRASS BALLS TO SELL US YOUR BASEBALL BOOK: We think we can all agree that ESPN baseball guy Jayson Stark is one of the more likeable sports journos who have turned to a teevee career. He’s in the room with Tim Kurkjian and Ken Rosenthal and every breathing member of SABR as fellows […]


NFL Phones It In With New Sideline Communication Technology

NFL PHONES IT IN WITH NEW SIDELINE COM TECHNOLOGY: The usual way of sideline chatter is being put on hold, as the NFL is ditching the old Batphones with brand-spanking new 21st-century technology:

Michael McCarthy of USA TODAY rings in news that for the 2007 season, coaches & players who want to call up the press […]


Dinner Date With Florida Gators Coach Urban Meyer Only 1 Million Dollars

GREENBACKS GUARANTEE GORGING WITH GATORS GENERAL: So, you’d like to have dinner with Urban Meyer? That’s no problem, just write out a check…for One Million Dollars!

The TAMPA TRIBUNE forks over news that a meal with the Florida coach will cost you an arm and a leg. (That’s usually how it is when you’re […]


Tim Donaghy Goodfoulers Hi Def Poker Barrow Blue Turf

• The folks at FARK TV sense some technical foul play with their Tim Donaghy take in “Goodfoulers”:

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS checks their pocket watch so they know when to join Merrill Hoge at 11 O’Cock.
• 100% INJURY RATE looks for the earplugs, as Floyd Mayweather Jr. is ready to sucker-punch the public with a […]