DON’T CALL ME SHIRLEY, OR MR. KOBE BRYANT A DOUCHE: Guess Phoenix Sun Paul Shirley missed the memo:

When chatting about Kobe Bryant with fans on ESPN.com, never, and I mean NEVER, call Bryant “A stream of water, often containing medicinal or cleansing agents, that is applied to a body part or cavity for hygienic purposes.”

SHOE BUYERS NOT TAKING A PASS ON BALL HOG’S SNEAKS: The phenomenon of Stephon Marbury’s “Starbury” shoes continues. NEWSDAY reports that the shoes are the hottest sneaker on the market, and have been selling out in stores.

Steve & Barry’s President Andy Todd: “That’s been our only problem. They’re sold out, coast to coast. We wish […]

MEMO TO D. JETER: TWINS OUTDOOR BALLPARK IS NO JOKE: Derek Jeter on the Twins building a new outdoor ballpark:

“What are they thinking? They’re kidding, right?”

VT STUDENT AND SPORTS BLOGGER HAS BLACKSBURG POV: AOL Sports Blog has another update from Virgina Tech student and sports blogger Nick Dallamora.

Dallamora: “My roommate seemed to have been up for quite some time as he gave me the major updates I missed through the night. I turned on the television and more names and […]

K-STATE FOOTBALL READY TO GO BACK WHERE IT BELONGS: The ASSOCIATED PRESS reports that second-year Kansas State football coach Ron Prince is throwing off the scheduling strategy of the only man who ever led the Wildcats to consistent winning records, Bill Snyder.

Snyder was notorious for scheduling non-conference opponents who were, ahem, less than competitive. But […]

Headline of the day from Fark.com:

“Carl Pavano returns after brief stint on abled list“

PIZZA DELIVERED AFTER FENWAY FAN’S FOUL POP DROP: Red Sox scouts bird-dogged a prospect amongst the Fenway Park faithful at yesterday’s Red Sox-Angels game:

Because of a dropped foul pop by another ticket-buying customer, the Sox may have spotted a future middle man - thanks to a fan’s 3/4 well-cheddared delivery.

FOXSPORTS.COM REDESIGNS WEBSITE; NO ONE NOTICES: Remember when I posted that Foxsports.com’s traffic had somehow overtaken ESPN.com? Everyone I talked to later about it said, “I never go to Foxsports.com.”

With the reax (or lack thereof) of Foxsports.com’s new look (launched today), I’m starting to believe them now (not that I ever visited there either - […]

LASORDA WAGERS FANS FORGOT ABOUT DAVE KINGMAN: SPORTS BUSINESS DAILY reports “Hearty laughs could be heard in the Dodger Stadium press box Sunday night when when scoreboard operators played a taped pre-game message from former manager Tommy Lasorda asking fans to refrain from using profane language.”

The reason for the laughter? This is the same Lasorda […]