AGASSI BOOK TO OUT LUST FOR BABS, ELECTROLYSIS TIPS: The ASSOCIATED PRESS reports that Andre Agassi is set to publish his memoirs, and will get paid $5M to do so.

The story should be a real tear jerker, especially the hair raising parts about the excruciating electrolysis sessions late in his career:

The AP includes this paragraph […]

TEXAS TECH KICKING GAME DOESN’T AD UP FOR LEACH: The DALLAS MORNING NEWS reports the Texas Tech football program “has been flooded with calls and e-mails from prospective punters responding to a help-wanted” ad placed by coach Mike Leach in the school newspaper.

Leach, who doesn’t have a single punter on the roster, on the response: […]

KING HELPS HILL LAND KEY INTIMACY-FREE VOTER BLOCK: Say what you will about the Clintons, but they sure as heck now how to run successful political campaigns.

For example, today Hillary won a key endorsement, landing the approval of the currently relevant Billie Jean King:

This could be the turning point in the upcoming election. Since everyone […]

ESPN KNOWS WHAT GOES TOGETHER - BLUSTER & BUFFALO:

Who sez ESPN doesn’t listen to the fans? First, the network reportedly will put Joe Theismann on college football broadcasts because of the apparent clamoring of crazy campus kiddos to keep the Joey Theesman flame alive.

Second, for the last five years, ESPN.com has deigned to let you […]

If this post by The Mighty MJD at AOL Fanhouse doesn’t make you smile …

… your name is Billy Packer.

ESPN “SCORECENTER” HAS ANCHOR CANDIDATES APLENTY: Good news for the hundreds among us who made the fateful decision to purchase those second generation, new-fangled ESPN mobile phones. Sports media’s friendly, neighborhood 800-pound Orangutan this week unveiled an exciting array of programming which will be exclusively beamed directly to your sweaty, little handset.

The two new shows […]

OLY SNOWBOARDER PUTS BEST CHICKEN BREAST FORWARD: This week, ink-stained Winter Olympic gold medalist snowboarder Tara Dakides won something called the “Roxy Chicken Jam Slopestyle“.

Transworld Snowboarding also dutifully reports that Leanne Pelosi won “Best Trick on the down-rail” and Jamie Anderson claimed “Best Trick on the kink bar”.And like you, I had no idea snowboarding […]

JOSE CANSECO USES BIG DICK HUNTER TO REVEAL REALITY: Hollywood’s endless search for a gargoyle-based reality show may be over, as something called “Big Dick Hunter” is set to announce this week a network-less reality show featuring the fun-loving, future-tumored Jose Canseco.

Larry Brown of Fox Sports reports that Canseco’s glorified cleaning woman publicist is depleting […]

PARTY IN TOMMY BOWDEN’S PANTS - AND YOU’RE INVITED! A certain sports blog has been celebrating a Pants Party for some time, and now someone else is getting in on the act:

An Ebayer is auctioning off 300 pairs of Clemson Tiger football and baseball pants, which will spark the closest thing the Palmetto State has […]

ESPN IGNORING REPORTER’S DONOVAN-TO-HEAT CLAIM?: While Kentucky fans continue their attempt to ruin Florida’s Final Four focus rumors of Billy Donovan’s imminent departure to Kentucky continue to percolate, Tom Friend of ESPN The Magazine announced on Jim Rome’s ESPN-TV show “Rome is Burning” yesterday that Donovan “is going to leave (Florida) and replace” Pat Riley […]