When I was a kid (read: last year), I used to create elaborate forts in my parents’ living room out of blankets, pillows, bookcases, and chairs. Once, I somehow managed to create a two-story, multi-roomed palace with a cardboard front gate that consumed the entire living room and connected with the kitchen door. It was the pinnacle, and the end, of my career in structural engineering. I mean, when you’ve got YOUR OWN CARDBOARD FRONT GATE for crying out loud, what more can you do to top it? So I retired from the fort-building business forever.
Little did I know then, as I folded up the blankets and reassembled the dining room table, that it didn’t have to end that way. I could have persevered and gone on to accomplish ever more ludicrous fort-like structures. If only I had devoted myself to basketball, gone to the University of New Mexico, and gotten drafted by the Indiana Pacers, my love of fantastical forts and secret passages could have been indulged. Danny Granger did persevere and did choose that path, and that’s why he’s now got a Batcave. Yes, we’ll repeat that: Danny Granger has a Batcave in New Mexico.
A Batcave. As in, the secret hideout of the superhero Batman. And Danny Granger of the Indiana Pacers is building one in New Mexico. Sure, some fans may criticize athletes for not staying in their work cities year-round, but did we mention DANNY GRANGER IS BUILDING A BATCAVE IN NEW MEXICO?
Indiana Pacers forward Danny Granger, a confessed superhero fan, wants digs similar to Batman’s. So he’s building a batcave in New Mexico. Designs of a hidden underground tunnel entrance recently hit a snag because of state building codes, but the getaway is supposed to be livable within a couple years. An underground garage and surrounding moat are expected. “He likes to dabble in different things,” says his agent, Mark Bartelstein.
Allow us to hastily convene a special session of the SPORTSbyBROOKS Award Presentation Committee. We have to hand out two special awards here, immediately:
- SbB Award for BATS**T AWESOME INSANITY hereby awarded to Danny Granger of Batcave, New Mexico.
- SbB Award for UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR hereby awarded to Mark Bartelstein of Chicago, Illinois.
“Dabbling in different things” means picking up a paintbrush once a year to attempt an oil painting, or dusting off those skis in the garage and heading to Steamboat every few years. “Building a Batcave in New Mexico” does not qualify as dabbling. You don’t dabble in Building Batcaves, particular Batcaves in New Mexico. That’s full-on Batcave Building immersion. And it’s spectacular.