Colorado Buffaloes Herded Into Discipline Teams

University of Colorado head coach Dan Hawkins certainly knew “den mother” fell on his list of responsibilities, but he hoped “warden” didn’t. Unfortunately, 13 players found their way into the legal system in and around Boulder since fall of 2007, not to mention academic ineligibility and other tomfoolery.

Dan Hawkins

Therefore, Hawkins has declared an end to the fighting and boozing and armed robbery and all the other all-American activities. However, he knows his staff can’t police all the players all the time.  Therefore, he’s (figuratively) stapled nine guys together at a time in discipline “teams” and tied the fortunes of each young man to the others on their team.

Joey wants to pound a few brewskis before his 21st and gets caught? Nine men are missing games, scrubbing toilets, hugging kids at children’s hospitals, etc. It’s already started working, apparently; players are texting their teammates to make sure they’re taking tests and attending classes.

Of course, someone has to organize and maintain those discipline teams, don’t they? That’s why Hawkins and athletic director Mike Bohn are hiring a “director of ’student-athletes wellness’”. We’ve actually heard a rumor about the person that will be hired for the position.  His credentials can’t be overlooked, though he has been accused of lacking vision.

Mr Magoo

Shh.  Don’t disturb him.  He’s hunting Buffaloes.

Leave a Reply