We’re not suggesting Coke has fallen behind Pepsi in Pacific Asia for any one reason, but it doesn’t hurt that Coke’s local bottlers have not been as aggressive as Pepsi’s recently. For example, Thailand’s young boxing phenom received news in Beijing that Pepsi has set up swag tents on his front lawn. Coke ran in behind and offered more money if Pepsi would just take down the tents.

Now they’re being forced to co-exist in his front yard until the Games are over. Then we imagine the boxer/police sergeant will deal with the matter the only way he knows now: let his agent handle it. (Side note: American Olympians work at Home Dept; Thai Olympians are police sergeants. Jus’ sayin’.)

Of course, none of this addresses the core issue in this battle royale: as Berke Breathed put it, they both taste like malted battery acid anyway.