GOD COMMANDED CHRIS RIX TO SMITE SPORTS BLOGGER: FLASH WARNER fills us in on the laugh-a-minute latest regarding Chris Rix, the former, failed Florida State quarterback we’ve all forgotten about (except Burt Reynolds’ personal assistant).
14 months ago Warner had an epic post on BLOG CRITICS (and her own site) detailing a sports academy that Rix was fronting. Apparently he was promising to lead young athletes to greatness with his own personal rule-by-rule training techniques.
As a handy public service, Warner recounted in her post some of the rules Rix listed on the academy website - and more!: “Rule 10: SERVE YOU TEAMMATES (sic)… Show you (sic) teammates a selfless/unselfish player who puts them first.
“Amazingly, the website omits rules 11, 12, and 12a:
Don’t sleep through your exams and get suspended for the Sugar Bowl; ‘Even when in a hurry, don’t use unauthorized tags to park in a handicap spot when regular spaces are available;’
“‘Avoid using the ‘outpatients only’ spot at your university’s geriatric clinic.’”
Fast forward to yesterday, as Warner noted on her personal website, “a week after my post appeared on BlogCritics I received a patronizing e-mail with the subject line ‘no hard feelings’ from one Chris Rix. I shared it with a few friends for laughs but it didn’t go any further.”
Warner then reported in the same post that the former FSU QB had yesterday (14 months after the original post!) sent an email threatening to slap a “Federal Subpeona (still sic)” on BlogCritics.com, Google.com and Ms. Warner unless the post was removed from the BlogCritics.com database and search engine.
Warner reax: “I didn’t make up lies about Rix or Champion Training Academy. I simply questioned the qualifications of Rix, who, as a primary instructor, claims to teach young quarterbacks qualities that - in my opinion - he never mastered.
“If Jim Kelly wrote a book titled “Winning the Super Bowl,” or Michelle Wie ran an academy called “Making the Cut on the PGA Tour,” I’d be within my rights to say, “Hey Jim? Uh, Michelle? Excuse me, but you know nothing about that.”
Our advice to Mr. Rix: It really sounds like you need a change of scenery. May we suggest Turkmenistan?