• A former Bengal confirms that Ocho Cinco went muy loco during a playoff game and slugged coach Marvin Lewis.

• Chinese officials claim that the Dalai Lama wants to disrupt the Beijing Olympics. So he’s got that going for him, which is nice.

• Pat Riley wants to reimburse Heat fans for the team’s horrendous play. Maybe he can borrow some dough from Carl Pohlad.

• Next week, SPORTS ILLUSTRATED offers all Favre, all the time.

• Jacoby Ellsbury & Josh Beckett do their little turns on the catwalk.

• Q: What’s a Bucknell broadcaster’s favorite church basement game?

A: BIIIIIIIIIIN-GOOOOOOOOO!

• A LeBron James fan’s quick trip onto the court ends with a journey to jail.

• Ministry busts out some block-rockin’ beats with a new Chicago Blackhawks song.

• Wow! The Pittsburgh Pirates actually spent money on something!

• An English soccer fan would rather replace a proposed statue of Gandhi with Gary Lineker.