America is a country founded on the Protestant work ethic. Australia is a slapdash nation thrown together by a bunch of convicts. The Whizzinator was a model of ingenuity, where form meets function in a stylish, secretive way to pass drug tests. In Australia, they just give you a urine-filled condom and a sharpened lollipop […]

How unbelievable was Mine That Bird’s Kentucky Derby win? So unbelievable that even his jockey doesn’t think he has a shot in the Preakness Stakes next week.

Calvin Borel is abandoning Mine That Bird for the nation’s top filly, Rachel Alexandra. He calls her a “once-in-a-lifetime horse,” but isn’t just having the chance for a […]

Manny Ramirez may be baseball royalty, but he’s not actual royalty (though, oddly enough, Sidney Ponson is). So the latest news that ties the British Royal Family to steroid use ought to make George Mitchell’s head explode.

(”Let’s up the dosage to 75 mg a day.” “Good idea, Your Majesty.”)
This is all a roundabout way (for […]

It’s Gary Bettman’s wet dream, we’re just living in it.

While NBA Commissioner David Stern sits back and prays for a Cavaliers-Lakers final, a matchup that would deliver LeBron James vs. Kobe Bryant, his NHL counterpart (and former assistant) is soaking in exactly what can happen when a sports two transcendent stars face off in the […]

Today was not a good day to be a front-runner. Even after morning-line favorite I Want Revenge scratched, there were a handful of horses with great odds; any one of them a potential Triple Crown Contender. Then, the rains came, and any hope of a normal race washed away.

Mine That Bird, a 50-1 longshot, took […]

As always, the reach of SbB stretches across the country, and last time we checked, Louisville is still in the country. So, as the Derby closes in on the starting horn, we bring you some of the day’s best, in the form of photos from the red carpet and infield.

And what kind of a big […]

Bedlam, horror, and panic rule the day today, as the morning-line favorite in the Kentucky Derby, I Want Revenge, was scratched from today’s race this morning. Let’s get this straight: they’re doing this to a giant, muscular animal that is actually named “I Want Revenge.” This can’t end well.

(”I also want oats. But mainly REVENGE.”)
What’s […]

As you watch the Kentucky Derby this weekend, you’ll see all of the pageantry and excitement of the largest horse race in the world taking place in front of hundreds of thousands of screaming fans. But don’t let that fool you: Almost all of those fans are there for the spectacle of race day more […]

The discerning reader prefers the news (and most foods) wrapped in bacon and liberally salted with panic. Therefore, we provide your Thursday morning sports-centric swine flu stories to better arm you at the water cooler to pass along the latest gossip mumbled through your faux designer mask:

Texas has suspended all baseball and softball tournaments, eliminated […]

While the entire human population of the world is freaking out about a possible swine flu pandemic, this is a scary time for the animal kingdom as well. Just last week, 21 polo horses dropped dead in Florida due to a medication mixup. The other day, 38 assorted animals died in a fire at a […]