Remote-Control Bowling Balls Seem A Little Unfair

You know how in those Star Wars movies, the Jedi guys could use The Force to make things move without touching them? How come those guys never cheated at sports? Like, I know Obi-Wan and Luke were “the good guys” and they were off doing their hero things, but you can’t tell me Darth Vader […]


Repubs: Bowling For Dollars In The White House!

First he takes heat for not letting women play in his pickup basketball games, and now this. Republicans are claiming that President Obama is using the White House bowling alley like the Lincoln bedroom. Kinky? Sorry, no.

Critics are saying that if you donate mucho bucks to the Democrats, Obama will let you roll free games […]


Shawn Chacon In Gambling/Bowling-Related Arrest

When last we left pitcher Shawn Chacon, he had “accidentally” choked Houston Astros general manager Ed Wade, and threw him to the ground. As would happen to you or me, that got him released and banished to the Newark Bears, where he played until signing a Single-A contract with the Oakland A’s on June 18.

Well […]


Senior Bowlers Put Beat-Down On Purse Snatcher

Remember when they released the “Cocoon” DVD, and it included that hilarious deleted scene in which all the old people went bowling, and then beat up a teenaged purse snatcher? Oh wait, that might have been real life. Moral of story: Do not attempt to steal things during V.I.P. Trio Summer League at Hillsboro Park […]


Bowling Coach Munsons His Child Porn Taping

I guess they have coaches for everything, but I’ve never really heard of a youth bowling coach. The closest thing I could think of to a bowling coach was Woody Harrelson as Roy Munson in “Kingpin,” and I don’t think you would have wanted his character within 500 feet of children of any age.

Then again, […]


At Lebowski Fest 2009, That’s Just How They Roll

Maude Lebowski: “What do you do for recreation?”
The Dude: “Oh, the usual. I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback.”
It’s a weird slice of irony that out of all the Coen brothers’ whimsical, idiosyncratic offerings, “The Big Lebowski” should be the one that’s garnered the biggest cult following. There was no doubt of that on […]


Fred Smoot’s Pro Bowling Ambitions To Be Tested

Fred Smoot is hoping to strike again. But have no fear, aquatic prostitutes of the Beltway, and get your mind out of the gutter. Then get it back in the gutter, because Smoot is planning to join the PBA.

The Washington DB rolled a 212 this week at a team bowling outing, and already seems to […]


Bad Alley Manners Lead To Bowling Ball Assault

For the love of god, mind your manners while bowling. It’s not only impolite to bowl at the same time as the neighboring lane, but it could be hazardous to your health.

A dispute over bowling etiquette this week led to an all-out brawl that led to one man getting hit in the face with a […]


Special Olympics Bowler Ready to Take On Obama

As Richard mentioned in this morning’s Speed Read, President Obama was on Leno last night, and he unexpectedly made an off-handed quip about the Special Olympics. When discussing his bowling game with The Big Chinned One, the commander in chief commented on his low-ball score of 129, adding that “It was like Special Olympics or […]