Farmer Hogging Attention By Hosting Pig Wrestling

Have we learned nothing from the monstrous Michael Vick dogfighting saga? Apparently not, as a Maryland farmer is intent on hosting a rough ‘n’ tumble event this weekend featuring his animals.

However, there are a few subtle differences between the two: While Vick’s fights were held in secrecy, Stan Dabkowski is proudly promoting his event. And […]

Read more...

UFC 88: Liddell Leveled by Evil Evans Evisceration

Chuck Liddell would like to tell his fans how much he loves them and how he intends to retire in the training room and not in a post-fight presser.  He may even want to express a sense of gratitude for leading such a charmed life and for having an innate talent at violence rewarded for […]

Read more...

Sour Swedish Wrestler Throws Away Bronze Medal

Way to go, Olympic judges. By “awarding” Swedish greco-roman wrestler Ara Abrahamian the bronze medal — when it was obvious to everybody that is effort was gold-medal-worthy — you’ve forced one of the sport’s biggest names and most charismatic figures into early retirement. Bravo, sirs.

Actually, I have no idea if Abrahamian is wildly popular in […]

Read more...

Even American Gladiators Need Love Sometimes

From the mightiest dictator to the meekest foot soldier, everyone needs somebody to love. Even if that person is in a job that consists of wearing lots of tight spandex and knocking other people into water with pugel sticks.

The VENTURA COUNTY STAR has the fluffy love story of Beth Horn (better known as “Venom” from […]

Read more...

UCLA’s Undie Run Yet Another (A)rousing Success

Near the completion of every academic quarter, the studious students of the University of California at Los Angeles try to shake off the stress of their studies by participating in a mass midnight jog around their Westwood campus. Such a traditional trot is known as the UCLA Undie Run.

Luckily, LAIST has compiled a photo essay […]

Read more...

America’s New Sensation: Cardboard Tube Fights

Kids today increasingly participate in sports. They learn how to succeed in sports. They sign up for leagues in sports. They join traveling teams in sports. However, they have slowly stopped playing sports. Sports should fall under the “play” side of the ledger, not the “work” side.
For us nominal adults, the […]

Read more...

Abstaining Before Big Game Won’t Stop Blowing

Le DEUCE OF DAVENPORT has a firm grip on the biggest news of the weekend (non-Clete Thomas division, of course): there’s absolutely no reason to believe pre-game relations will negatively affect performance on the field of play. In fact, sticking to routine will help focus the mind and possibly improve results.
Frankly, we’re happy to […]

Read more...

Floyd Mayweather Jr. Says HBO Is Racially Biased

Floyd Mayweather Jr. is retired from boxing, but that doesn’t mean he’s retired from talking. The outspoken pugilist gave the first interview of his post-boxing life to The Grand Rapids Press and covered a wide range of topics.

Money Mayweather says he loved playing the role of the villain, and he’s really retired from boxing. His […]

Read more...

Shark Attack Survivor Surfer ‘Sprouts’ Into Hottie

Bethany Hamilton, the young surfer girl that lost her left arm to a shark attack in 2003 and won the heart of a nation with her survival and bravery in the face of loss, has turned out quite well, thank you very much. Just ask the HONOLULU ADVERTISER: “Today, Bethany has lost her braces, […]

Read more...

Skateboarder Forgets ‘Half Your Age Plus 7′ Rule

With the rise of the so-called genre of action sports, a lot of snowboards are rising to mainstream recognition after having some success in competitions like the X-Games, and so forth.

(Whoa, dude. She looks 18 from up here)
And if that doesn’t work, you could always score some ink in the police blotter by allegedly […]

Read more...