‘Cable Guy’ Installs Football Team at Old School

From the man that brought you one-fourth of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, Witless Protection, Delta Farce, and that baby you see below, a new production has arrived from Dan Whitney (a.k.a. Larry the Cable Guy) that we honestly cannot wait to tell you about. It starts dozens of young men, will probably be seen by almost no one, and might just be the best work he’s ever done.

Larry the Cable Guy and his child

Ladies and gentlemen… the Berean Christian football team of West Palm Beach.

Berean Christian School hadn’t fielded a football team since 1981 due to lack of interest and funds for the tiny private school. However, times have changed and they were ready to start a team again this year. Just as bake sales and car washes were being planned, word filtered to one of the linemen for that 1981 squad: Dan Whitney. He opened his checkbook and paid for it all.

In fact, he invested so much into the new team that they bought better safety equipment and hired a former Hurricane (and official spiritual adviser to the Oakland Raiders), Kenny Berry, to coach. (By the way, Berean… if Kenny told you that he was a Charger for more than an hour and a half, he fibbed a little.)

Congratulations to Mr. Guy for contributing so heartily to a sporting cause. We really feel you… achieved this goal. No, no… accomplished this task. Wait. How about “made it happen”? Darn it. We’ll think of some way to express this sentiment simply and in T-shirt slogan format.

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