• What’choo talkin’ about? HOME RUN DERBY strokes us news that a minor league team is willing to offer Gary Coleman a contract.

• The MINNEAPOLIS STAR-TRIBUNE rolls along happy news that police have recovered a sick kid’s wheelchair that was stolen during a Twins game.

• YOU BEEN BLINDED takes a trip with Cincinnati Bengal Kenny Irons to the local Hooters.

• MACHOCHIP speaks with Juan Carlos Lozano & Raul Saenz, the duo behind the Brewers’ Spanish-language radio broadcasts.

• WEB TV HUB tries to present 50 sexy reasons to watch the Beijing Olympics.

• DEUCE OF DAVENPORT can’t see the fun in wrestling an invisible opponent. Monty Python’s Graham Chapman did it so much better.

• UNPROFESSIONAL FOUL believes there’s a few things American sports can learn from soccer, like player loans & regulation.

• The CHRONICLE OF HIGHER EDUCATION reports that the University of Tennessee leads the nation in spending more than $2 million on athletic recruiting. Just call them Fort Knox-ville.