There are few things as unabashedly joyous in this country as the football tailgate. People of all walks of life come together for a common goal â€” to share in the love of their team, and prove it by eating meat and drinking beer. There’s also quite a tradition of sharing. As long as you’re wearing the right colors, just about anyone will offer you a cold one and a cheddar brat. Heck, I’ve been wearing the road team’s gear and been welcomed by the opposing team’s fans in the spirit of good sportsmanship.
(Mom and dad must be proud.)
But, as Walter Sobchak says in The Big Lebowski: This is not ‘Nam, Smokey. There are rules. And one is that you don’t sneak around and steal things from other people’s tailgates. Because there are these things called cameras. And this other thing called the Internet. And when you take beer from Baylor fans, they’ll make sure you end up shamed for the rest of your life, like this young lady (thief) above. And it is posted as a reminder to the world that this aggression will not stand, man.
The victim of the heinous crime is a poster at BAYLORFANS.COM who goes by the handle of “SoonerFrogs.” Here’s what he has to say:
Caught in the act, stole at least 20+ beers from cooler in our truck. Anyone know who this is? They hung out at the Sig Ep tailgate. This was ridiculous. I really hope i never see these scumbags again.
I have no tolerance for this stuff. ill give it out all day long but when I come back and catch some scrub doing this, I will be angry. the best part was the girl telling us someone told her they could take whatever.
I’m sure her parents will be very proud to see that they’ve raised a daughter who has resorted to stealing alcohol at the world’s largest Baptist university.
Here’s the girl trying to scramble and explain herself. Even her friend on the left knows they’re hosed:
She’s clearly not embodying what her school is supposed to be all about, given the behavior expected of Baylor students:
It is expected that each Baylor student will conduct himself or herself in accordance with Christian principles as commonly perceived by Texas Baptists. Personal misconduct either on or off the campus by anyone connected with Baylor detracts from the Christian witness Baylor strives to present to the world and hinders full accomplishment of the mission of the University.
In other words, if you’re out of beer, that was God’s plan. Don’t push your luck.