OUR BAY AREA BASKETBALL HIT PIECE STRAIGHT OUTTA LA: We’ve got a message for the SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE: Snoop Dogg, Penny Marshall and Woody Harrleson attending Warriors playoff games does not make the crowd “influential” or “authentic” as stated by the Bay Area daily.

Bruce Jenkins writes Golden State throngs are (apparently suddenly) “one of the loudest, wildest, most influential crowds in all of sports … (a) hip and authentic crowd.”

Need more evidence on the counterfeit crowd? The CONTRA COSTA TIMES reports those yellow “We Believe” t-shirts being worn at home games (given out by club sponsor Comcast) “are being sold all over eBay, with hawkers trying to fetch as much as $150 for them.”

$150 for a urine-colored, low-thread count throwaway? So much for Frisco (be sure to use that nick when visiting) claiming L.A. has the vacuity market cornered.

Baron Davis has this reaction to the CCT on the aformentioned putrid pullovers: “It’s very intimidating when you walk in as an opponent and see all the yellow.”

Coincidentally, I had the same reax upon entering Daly City’s Cow Palace urinals at a San Jose Sharks game in 1991.

Meanwhile, ESPN.com’s Bill Simmons has a more thoughtful observation that we can’t quarrel with: “(Oracle Arena is) the only two places left [Madison Square Garden the other] with old-school fans, fans who have been coming to games for 30-40 years, fans of all colors, fans who genuinely understand basketball and every nuance that comes with it.”

Finally, you know your sports city has reached new heights of nothingness when Conan O’Brien broadcasts from your burg during the first round of your NBA team’s first round playoff appearance.

On last Friday’s show, O’Brien said, “I am sorry to say this is our last night in San Francisco. But on the bright side, we did last one more night than the Mavericks.”

Actually, according to The Big Lead, that might not have been the case (at least when it came to Cuban).