• SPORTS ILLUSTRATED votes Barack Obama’s alma mater as the best high school athletic program in the country.

• WITH LEATHER flies in the story of a couple of Hofstra hotties who almost missed graduation to try out for the Jets’ cheerleading squad.

• NE PATRIOTS DRAFT beats a dead horse, as they wonder how Arlen Specter would ring up the Eight Belles tragedy.

• GOSSIP GIRLS catches Eva Longoria Parker getting herself ready for her hubby’s first night of work in L.A.

• CAGE POTATO slams down this painful celebration of an MMA fighter flipping out.

• WE ARE THE POSTMEN takes it outside, as the Chicago Blackhawks may soon be skating at Soldier Field.

• MONDESI’S HOUSE uncovers news that a man arrested for public nudity is apparently a Penguins fan.

• FOOD COURT LUNCH thinks there’s an anti-Canadian conspiracy afoot in besmirching the maple bat.