Bailout, Gas Cash Spent on Formula One Escorts?

Singapore could not be happier to be hosting their first Formula One Grand Prix in these harsh economic times, hopefully coaxing in those hard-earned tourism dollars lost once it became clear that Gary Glitter wouldn’t be joining them for a cup of lightly-aged tea.  Where does Singapore turn in this dark hour to lure the high-end vacationer to see their putt-putt race?

Ford Escort Service

Why, escort services, of course.  In fact, it would appear that the escort industry (and we can’t tell you how difficult it was not to use the sarcasm quotes back there) will thrive all weekend on the two industries that have managed to come out well in this rather sharp and steep economic downturn:

This is the best weekend this year,” Prince Wong, owner of Singapore Escort Services, told THE STRAITS TIMES… Wong, who said his clients are foreign bosses in the gas and banking industries, declined to reveal the identity of both client and escort.

Well, okay… the one industry that’s made out like bandits and the other that will do so shortly on the backs of world taxpayers, especially American ones.   You get the idea.  Still, we wonder how Singapore found itself the recipient of a Formula One race for the first time.  Is it possible Mr. Wong managed to find Nazi costumes for his girls?

Naturally, disgustingly wealthy people have standards; they won’t take just any companion:

Agencies say their high-profile clients are picky about their escorts, asking for companions “from a good family background and at least a university degree,” the STRAITS TIMES said.

“They want escorts who don’t look, sound or dress like escorts. They want people to think, ‘what a nice girlfriend he has’,” it quoted an agency head as saying.

Of course.  After all, isn’t this the main subtext of “My Fair Lady”?  Get us a high-class broad; if not, we’ll brew our own!

And where’s that blasted plain?  In Singapore!