The New And Improved Redskins Aren’t Improved

The NFL season opener featured the defending Super Bowl champion New York Giants against their NFC East rival, the Washington Redskins. And It was like Joe Gibbs 2.0 never left. The new guy, Jim Zorn, was supposed to bring all this new energy, a new way of doing things, a new offense, so on and […]


NFL Will Allow Chad To Call Himself “Ocho Cinco”

For some reason, people care that Chad Johnson recently changed his name to Chad Javon Ocho Cinco. Fans cite this as more proof that Mr. Ocho Cinco is an egotistical jerk only interested in self-promotion. Maybe, but I’m not sure adding the Spanish words for “eight” and “five” to your driver’s license suddenly means you […]


600 Marlins Fans Didn’t Dress As Seats Yesterday

Florida residents must abhor professional baseball, which would explain why there are currently two franchises in the state. And apparently, it has nothing to do with winning; the Tampa Bay Rays lead the AL East, and the Florida Marlins are two games over .500 and eight games back in the NL East.

Yet nobody cares, and […]


Nevada Tries Publicly Shaming Fans Into Behaving

In recent years, the NFL has proactively sought to corral the incorrigibles that ruin the stadium experience for the rest of us, and now the college game is following suit. The circumstances are a little different — college affairs usually feature a mix of horny, drunk undergrads and a healthy dose of well-off alums; the […]


Rays Lead AL East And STILL Can’t Draw Fans?!

The Tampa Bay Rays have been in existence for 11 years and in that time they’ve never won more than 70 games. Until this season. The Rays are currently 30 games over .500, have been victorious 81 times already, and lead the AL East by 4.5 games over the Red Sox.

And yet, the fans continue […]


Gene Upshaw, Hall of Famer, NFLPA Director, Dies

Gene Upshaw, who made his name as an offensive lineman for the Raiders before becoming the executive director of the NFL Players Association, has died. The Hall of Famer, 63, had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer just four days ago, and according to the NFL PLAYERS ASSOCIATION web site, he passed away with his family […]


Spitz Says That Phelps Wouldn’t Have Beaten Him

Mark Spitz didn’t get an invite to the Beijing Olympics despite being VERY FAMOUS. So, in those moments when he wasn’t high-fiving himself for being really, really awesome, Spitz did what any of us would’ve done: he went to New York City to pimp a Hyatt Resorts vacation package.

While there, Spitz, who won seven gold […]


Heads Up, Italian Gals - Kemp’s Coming Your Way

Shawn Kemp is best known for fathering seven children out of wedlock before his 30th birthday, but apparently, he also had a second career as an NBA player.

After suffering through weight issues and legal troubles, Kemp, drafted 17th overall by the Sonics in 1989, was out of the league by 2003. He had a failed […]


Pats Are Absolutely Dreadful Without Ailing Brady

If you caught any of the Sunday night Patriots-Buccaneers game, two things were immediately apparent: Pats head coach Bill Belichick was in mid-season, full-on hobo mode, and New England is an unmitigated train wreck without quarterback Tom Brady on the field.

Brady has yet to take a snap in the preseason, and he didn’t even make […]


UT Baseball Coach Removed From USC Practice

As USC’s 2008 season opener fast approaches, it has become increasingly important to stem the flow of information that could potentially make its way into the hands of the enemy. Sorta like the Bush White House but without all the leaks.

Anyway, the Trojans are preparing for their Aug. 30 matchup against the Virginia Cavaliers and […]