Audio: TCU’s Gary Patterson On Ass-Less Chaps

Jay Christensen of TheWizofOdds.com via Jimmy Traina at SI.com’s Hot Clicks via Jim Beseda of the PORTLAND OREGONIAN has the delightful highlights of a media conference call Tuesday involving Oregon State Coach Mike Riley and TCU Coach Gary Patterson as they discussed their Sept. 4 season opener at Cowboy Stadium in Dallas.

Gary Patterson asked about ass-less chaps

Beseda was nice enough to transcribe what happened and Jay Christensen came through huge with the audio.

Operator: “We’ll go next to Amy Cummings with Rawhide Nation Sports Blog.”

Blogger: “Hey, coaches. Uhh, Coach Riley, whose team has the most arrests, you guys or the Oregon Ducks?”

Riley: “Has the most what?”

Riley: (Chuckles) “I don’t know. I don’t keep a tally of that.”

Blogger: “All right. Coach Patterson, will any of your players or cheerleaders be wearing ass-less chaps for the Cowboy Classic?”

Patterson: “I don’t know that answer, either. I have a hard time just keeping track of my 105.”

Blogger: “Coach Riley … Pete Rose, in or out of the Hall of Fame?”

Riley: “You’re asking me something I don’t know anything about. I don’t know what all goes into that or what’s taken place.”

Blogger: “All right. Coach Patterson, what are your thoughts on Lindsay Lohan getting out of jail early and entering a rehab clinic?”


Patterson: “Uhm … still no answer.”

Moderator: “Guess you’re busy getting ready for football season, right coach?”

Patterson: “That’s just it.”

Moderator: “OK, do we have any other questions for any other callers?”

Operator: “We’ll go next to John Warren with 1240 Joe Radio.”

Warren: “Yeah, that’s kind of interesting to follow …”

After his deadpanned response to being asked about ass-less chaps, I’ll never, ever question Patterson’s ability to coordinate a defense on the fly.