PORNO BIZ DEALT BLOW AS ANNA SIGNS K-SWISS DEAL: Shock and utter disbelief has swept across the softcore porn industry as Anna Kournikova has delayed her inevitable nudie debut in order to sign an endorsement deal with K-Swiss.

The long-over athlete will appear in TV ads and make appearances for the long-over shoe and apparel maker.

In a surprise move, K-Swiss will not line her up for any “Turn Back The Clock” nights at various sporting venues, which would’ve allowed us to remember the good old days, when she wasn’t rag-n-bone *sigh*:

K-Swiss must be planning on making some product adjusts, since the Anna sign now means their target audience is sedentary, early-40s males with large Penthouse back-issue collections.