49ers’ Receiver Channels His Inner Maya Angelou

Catching a football and writing poetry aren’t exactly two things that go hand-in-hand. I mean, Keats could write a mean stanza, but could he run a square in? Enter the 49ers’ Josh Morgan, a rookie receiver who just this year has endured a staph infection, a torn groin, and two months of Mike Singletary.

Josh Morgan

(”See you later, BC fool / I beat you like a rented mule.”)

So Morgan, who was at Virginia Tech during the campus massacre and grew up in a rough area in Washington, D.C., lets the words flow whenever he feels the inspiration. And of course he uses every poet’s favorite tool for writing down his or her thoughts — a T-Mobile Sidekick.

The SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE’s John Crumpacker cranks up the melodrama in his profile of Morgan, which contains several examples of the wideout’s poetry. To wit:

“I came out strange at birth with my hands behind my back/

looking like I was under arrest/

Scared mommy at first but (I) turned out to be the one/

God would truly bless!”

Poetry was not one of my strong suits, so far be it from me to criticize the guy’s work. But Crumpacker treats these words with such reverence that you’d think Maya Angelou was hearing footsteps. I’m not sure, though, that most poets are banging out lines on their cell phone while getting their groin iced down after football practice.

Lest you think Morgan might be the first professional athlete who could become a published poet, that honor already belongs to Mariners pitcher Miguel Batista, who also wrote a crime novel.

Honestly, I admire Morgan for being in touch with his emotions and channeling his energy into something positive rather than, say, accidentally shooting himself while out at a club. But it just goes to show how little we expect out of professional athletes in this society that when one writes remedial poetry on a Sidekick our first inclination is to react as if the guy is some amazing renaissance man.

Our second inclination is to mock him mercilessly, which I’ll leave to those of you in the comments section.