Japanese Schoolgirl Signed By Pro Baseball Team

That weird smell hovering in the Los Angeles air for the past few days? Turns out it wasn’t the smoldering remnants from blocks of burnt down houses. It didn’t even come from America, actually. The stench came from Japan, and it was the smell of fear. You see folks, a whole lot of male Japanese ballplayers have been spending the last few days messing their pants, because they’re about to get embarrassed by a girl!

Eri Yoshida

The above photo is of Eri Yoshida. She’s 16 years old, throws a mean knuckleball - her favorite player is Tim Wakefield - and she just signed a contract with the Kobe 9 Cruise, a professional team in an independent Japanese baseball league. She will become the first-ever woman in Japan - and, as far as I know, the world - to play side-by-side with men. This is a big deal.

More from MLB.COM:

“I always dreamed of becoming a professional,” Yoshida said at the news conference. “I have only just been picked by the team and have not achieved anything yet.” Yoshida threw a hitless inning in a tryout and was one of 33 players taken in the draft.

It’s good to see she’s remaining humble, so far at least. It’s only a matter of time before she gets a lucrative deal from Hello Kitty to put a decal on her glove and the fame goes to her head. By that point, she’ll be finishing out each strikeout by pointing and laughing in a high-pitched giggle at the opposing player’s lost masculinity.

It’s going to be awesome.